In 2017, I became affected by Bell’s Palsy at the age of 27 following a traumatic pregnancy and birth. Leading up to the sudden attack of facial palsy, my body had gone through the most physical and mental battering and been pushed to its limit. It was decided my baby needed to be delivered early at 33 weeks. This meant he needed to spend four weeks on the neonatal unit and I would have to travel to the hospital every day to see him. With three other children at home, the situation was stressful and I felt torn between my parental duties whilst also trying to recover from the c-section.
The day finally came that my son was well enough to come home. Life was about to become so much easier, or so I thought. I had no idea what was about to happen to me a week later. We had family round visiting the new addition, everyone was chatting away and relieved that family life was getting back to some kind of normality. I felt a slight tingling on one side of my lip, it felt like pins and needles I think is the best way to explain it. I have had that feeling before when I used a lip gloss that I was allergic to so I wasn’t concerned.
After about half an hour the tingling got worse and was really irritating me. I could feel my lips going numb on that one side. As this was happening it became difficult to pronounce my words properly, and I went to look in my big mirror at my face. It was instantly noticeable that it wasn’t just my lips, but the surrounding area on that side was not working properly. I started to panic, telling my partner “look I can’t smile” trying my hardest to smile or bare all my teeth. I sent pictures to my mum who first mentioned the term ‘Bells’ to me, but also warned me to go straight to hospital if my arms or legs went funny.
I sat on the bed thinking how typical my life is. I finally get my baby home and I won’t have to deal with hospitals anymore, and here I am having a stroke! Please just give me a break! It was late on a Sunday and I was not going up the hospital unless it was totally necessary, and decided I’d go to my doctors in the morning. The next day I woke up and my partner was very concerned. He said it was much more noticeable now and that the whole side of my face had drooped. At this point, I realised my eyelid was not working either. It wouldn’t close or blink at all.
I rang my doctors who said to come straight round when they heard my symptoms, obviously so they could rule out the possibility of a stroke. After a few physical tests, I was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy and told that it would go by itself after about 6 weeks (try 6 months). I was given some steroid tablets and mild painkillers, and was told that the steroid tablets probably won’t help but will make me gain weight. Oh, great cheers, just the confidence boost I needed. One thing the doctor did not explain was the nerve pain that was about to come as my facial nerves went about trying to heal themselves.
The pain was a lot worse on a night time, as lying down puts more pressure on the nerves. It was a sharp, shooting pain that would travel from behind my ear, down to my jaw and up around the back of my head. Again, always on the affected side. I was prescribed Amitriptyline but quickly had to progress to stronger medications to tackle the pain. I had to do so much internet research myself about what was happening to me as the doctor had offered very little explanation.
Over the next few months, I faced a lot of difficult situations due to half my face just not wanting to cooperate anymore. The school run was so embarrassing. Having to try and repeat what had happened over and over, when you can’t pronounce your words. Also, who decided to call it Bell’s Palsy?! When ‘B’ and ‘P’ are two of the hardest sounds to pronounce! I constantly had people look at me confused like “What is Mell’s Malsy?”. I just tried to avoid social situations as much as possible, and luckily I had a newborn as a good excuse not to leave the house or make plans.
I had to adapt my meals to make them manageable to chew. Like after you have been to the dentist and everything just slides out of one side of your mouth. I’d have a pile of tissue next to me for all the spillage, and straws in every drink or a sports bottle so I could just squirt liquid straight down my throat. When going out anywhere with the baby, after getting the changing bag ready I’d also have to make sure I had all my own new extras. My mouth was the first thing that went back to normal which took about 3 months.
My eye took longer to sort itself out, and it was about 6 months until I could fully close it without having to hold it down. The elements were not kind to my eye, and it didn’t seem to matter what season it was, every kind of weather brought its own issues. A slight breeze would blow stuff straight into my eye. The sunlight would make my eye stream with tears, unable to squint or blink. I couldn’t wear any eye makeup for that period of time which really knocked my confidence and was just generally annoying as playing about with makeup is something I really enjoy.
At 12 months with Bell’s, I finally got to see a neurologist who agreed with me that I was about 70% recovered and this was the best it was going to get for me. That is hard news to digest at 27 years old and is not something you are prepared for when you initially get diagnosed. As I was still having the nerve pain, I was prescribed Pregabalin to take on a night time before bed. This has given me some issues with my memory but is the only medication that has worked so far in controlling the pain. Other than that, there was nothing he could do to help me. It happened, it’s rubbish, and that is that. His parting words were “try not to get overstressed as people who have Bell’s Palsy tend to get reoccurrences”. I will be sure to mention the stress thing to my four children back home.
Now at 18 months since I was diagnosed, my face looks fine and you would not know about any facial palsy unless I told you about it. I have learned to mask and disguise things and can move my mouth in ways to help with speech. I still have to put extra effort into closing my eye and use drops to prevent it from drying out. It is important to see an optician throughout your recovery to help maintain the general health of your eye, as well as record any changes to your vision. Very rarely on the odd day, my mouth will feel weaker and I may have to go back to taking smaller bites and using a straw.
Overall, I am happy with my recovery, even if this is as good as it gets. Compared to how I looked that day I was diagnosed and had my own children stare at me like I was a stranger. I wish my doctor had spent more time with me on that day to explain what was happening and what to expect over the next few months. As a young woman with a good social life, I found the changes very depressing and that my appearance was in control of my life. It has made me mentally stronger, it has taught my children to be kinder, and I thank my lovely family and friends for being so patient and supportive through this journey.
Disclaimer: Please note that views expressed are person’s own and should not be considered a recommendation of particular medical treatments, therapies or surgeries. We would always advise you seek advice from a health professional with experience in facial palsy who can assess your individual needs.
