Vivian’s third child was born with facial palsy in 1969, here she shares her story.
Karen as a toddler
Our daughter Karen was born in a hospital in Peterborough in 1969. I had had a reasonable pregnancy, there was nothing to concern me or the medical staff. We already had two boys, the eldest was a forceps delivery but the second was straightforward. The only thing I did notice was a pain in my side on quite a few occasions but I put it down to baby movements.
When labour started in late March I went into hospital and was soon taken through to the delivery room, in those days you didn’t take your husband in with you. All started normally but I was getting very tired, it was then that the medical staff told me it was probably going to be a facial delivery. There was a rush to call in other staff to see, as at that time it was quite rare to see a facial presentation, I don’t know if it still is today. So now we had an audience and that was when I was told the baby was stuck. With a great deal of encouragement she was finally born.
In those days they took the baby away so it wasn’t until the next day that they brought her to the ward for me to feed her. I said “She’s my little Nelson, she has one eye a bit open all the time.” One of the nurses overheard me and quickly rushed her straight back to the nursery. Shortly after the doctor returned to explain the condition to me, but he had no answers that satisfied me. He said I had to just wait and see if it improves, there was no one to compare notes with, except the family, and it was difficult because she was a bit different in some of her facial movements, but that was all. I was torn between wanting more information and reassurance, but also I did not want her to feel different.
We had many appointments at various hospitals, one of the first was to have her photograph taken. This was quite horrific to me because she was sleeping and I was told to pinch her to make her cry. It’s only in recent years that I have shared the photo taken that day with Karen.
The hospital photo that upset Vivian so much
I had decided to bottle feed her which helped as we knew how much milk she was taking. She had a brain scan and she visited a plastic surgeon, who advised we should leave well alone as all surgery will leave a scar. We were told it would be a few years before we knew if there would be any brain damage.
After that I was watching her progress all the time, I tried my best not to push her but I was constantly monitoring for changes and obviously I wanted to know that she was going to be okay.
Of course I asked myself if I had caused this in any way. You do feel very lonely when told yours is the only case. I think one of the worse times for both Karen and I was school photograph day.
Disclaimer: Please note that views expressed are person’s own and should not be considered a recommendation of particular medical treatments, therapies or surgeries. We would always advise you seek advice from a health professional with experience in facial palsy who can assess your individual needs.